Thursday, January 1, 2015

Resolute

I was going to write about how I made it through all of last year without buying any clothes.  Except for socks and underwear.  Sometimes you need new socks and underwear.  That was my 2014 New Year's resolution, and I did it.  Good for me.

But, honestly, how much can be said about the fact that I have too many clothes, not enough money, and a modicum of will power.  There it is.  Blog complete.  Some will be impressed by ability to make it through the year, others will just shrug.  Huzzah!  A millennial was able to show some self control!  Mazel tov!  And so on.

What's really on my mind is what I will do with this coming year.  2015.  The year of Back to the Future II.  There was the classic flurry of resolutions and reflections on the Facebook as 2014 drew to a close, and I wondered where my aspirations would fit in.  There was plenty of "I'm going to love myself this year!" and "This is the year of me!".  "I'm going to finally start taking care of myself physically, emotionally, and mentally!"

NEWSFLASH:

Every year is the year of you.  What has everyone been doing for the past year?  It's beyond me.

I understand that my Facebook/social life (how unfortunate that those two things are so closely intertwined) has become a veritable avalanche of quarter-life crises and babies.  Mom problems, mixed with first world problems, mixed with life changing event problems.  And nobody really cares anymore.  We are all so bombarded with other people's problems that we realize that nobody is listening to our qualms and complaints.  Has it come to a point where our only option is to look to ourselves for comfort and care?  Won't that just mean that everyone keeps focusing on themselves and no one is going to receive the attention and love they need?  Should we all just learn to turn inward for support?  I can say from personal experience, this course of action can be highly effective and dangerously exhausting.

Of course everyone needs to focus on themselves at times.  There is nothing I support more than self-awareness and cultivating self-worth.

But you can't give up on the rest of the world in the process.  There has to be some balance.  And I will be the first to admit that balance is something I can't quite get the knack of.  The closest I get to balance is running from one extreme to the other, so that the average is somewhere in the middle.  So I'm going to throw out into the universe the idea of the dual resolution.  Make a pact with yourself to become a better you, by all means, get to know yourself this year.  But not at the expense of everyone else.  How much would you love for one of your friends to take an extra minute out of their day to genuinely ask how you're doing?  Be that friend.  How much would a call or text from an old colleague or classmate mean to you?  Make that connection.  How gratifying is it when a stranger pays you a sincere compliment?  Fun fact!  YOU can be that stranger.

This past year, I had another resolution.  It was called "Kind word Tuesdays".  I tried to send kind words to someone at least once a week.  I didn't always succeed, but I made an effort, and I think the recipients appreciated it.  Maybe we could make a few more resolutions like that?